Femininity

I have no doubt that the woman is, indeed, a superior species *grin*.
Sure, we are created equal, but we have pushed ourselves into a whole
new level of Being. Women are the true Lovers. They hold family
together. They make peace: with food, lovemaking, listening (really
listening), brainstorming, multitasking. childbearing.

Not all women are like this. I think that the desperate state of our
world has pushed some of us into 'survival mode'. We have become lean,
hungry, manipulative and desperate. Cold.

I used to feel like this. It is only within the past two years that I
have come into my femininity. I feel quite womanly. Soft. Loving.
Open. I feel like a peacemaker. I can stand up for myself and defend
my own when necessary.

My relationships have changed significantly during this time period. I
feel closer to everyone in my world. I feel closer to everything not
of this world.

I feel so human. Fragile and strong at the same time. I perceive that
the sensitivity that is my strength becomes my greatest weakness. I
find myself having a Dark Night of the Soul most nights. My soul weeps
and strains. I moan with grief, wondering why I incarnated, why I
should feel pain. Worry. Fear. Uncertainty. I wake up the next day,
smiling, happy that I can FEEL. I can BREATHE. LOVE, LIVE, LAUGH.

I remember my friends, the Trees. I receive a loving kiss from my
Lover the Sun. The grief retreats slowly, under the surface of my
mission. I'm starting to suspect it is necessary.

This grief is what propels me closer to my Beloved. It saturates every
level of my being. This constant yearning is probably saving my life.