pictures

ake copy
Originally uploaded by dharmashakti.

after much thoughtful query throughout this, our world wide web, I have discovered an easy way to share pictures with y'all!!! whew. Now that i've done it I can sleep in peace :)

this is me being coy and flirty. enjoy.

after cancer

I feel better today. This past week has been sort of an emotional rollercoaster. not sort of-it has. I finally shared my troubles with my mami, after some resistance from my ego. What broke me down was my brother's cynical views on my situation: "you're screwed". lol. I couldn't end it on that note and had to seek more optimist views. I feel like I'm naturally a happy and optimistic person, and I get tired of being angry or sad very quickly. Thank God. Anyway, so I mostly go through cycles of being sad, upset for 1 day, the next day I get tired of it...become quite happy and fun for a few days, then I might start overthinking the situation that saddened me, and so on, until I work through it.

Its amazing that its been 3 weeks since my surgery to remove the tumor. I feel kind of lazy, like I should be doing more. I feel more ready to start my spiritual disciplines once again.

First task is to start waking up earlier...I'm compensating for that with falling asleep earlier :) Second task is to quit watching so much TV. Its rather boring and mostly leaves me feeling frustrated. Today I told myself I was not turning the TV on unless it was to watch the movies I've netflixed: What the bleep do we know!, Sex and Lucia, and Pirates of the Caribbean. I haven't felt like watching any of them since M left.

Last night I had a dream with Sathya and Ma. Esperanza...two very close spiritual friends who live in Venezuela. It was quite sweet. I had very real eye contact with Sathya...I felt very present in the moment, and it is quite clear in my mind right now. Ma. Esperanza and I shared an emotional hug...I miss her sweet smile. Happy Birthday, Beautiful!

dessert at john's

its 9pm and mom and monica and i just arrived at john and carol's. kelli is down from atlanta...i've missed her so. i'm excited because they have tons of desserts for me :)....seems to be my medication of choice, as i am not on pain meds. seriously though, everyone seems very concerned about pain, which i understand, but i cannot seem to convey the fact that its the fatigue that sucks.

i'm sad because monica is leaving tomorrow (probably) and she's been my constant and faithful companion. she never lets me get too serious, as is my nature. i tend to be grumpy and slightly emotional (right...) but her neverending sunshine brightens my day. i love you monica!

oh yes, while we're here. monica and i are depressed because we've just watched the latest episode of Smallville on the WB , where Alicia died!!!!! What a tragedy!!! Oh, we both just about burst into tears ( I did the first time I saw it). It really sucks because they really loved each other, and I'm just about fed up with Lana Lang. egh. I'm getting too excited about this, so I'll stop writing before I tear out my stitches.

I love you all, and have a good night!

crazy doings at 1 am

oy...hello world! I'm starting a blog! it's pink and its name is the Sunshine Chronicles. egh.

I've decided to contribute my mysterious powers of creation to the mystical world of the www. I can't help but want to spread a little sunshine in this seeminly dark world. If we could only see through our real eyes...

kissy, kissy. have a good night.